brain dump

IMG_8775We’ve been going on summer night walks. Do you ever want to walk forever? Someday I hope Andy gets home before 7 pm, so dinner doesn’t go til 8, and if that ever happens, I know in the summer nights we will walk and run and bike, and I hope it’s for forever.

I always thought when I was like, 25, I would have life figured out. No more freaky decisions, sure of everything, no longer scared of people, easy peasy. Why did that not happen?

Andy took two summer classes this j-term. It’s been all summer, but for two weeks, man that was pure torture. I thought we were going to die. Why does everything bad happen on the already worst weeks and then no one has time to make dinner and I don’t even know the last time I cleaned and I want to get rid of a million things.

Speaking of, do you ever just want to throw everything away? Lately all I want to do is get rid of everything. I want to downsize (even more) (except have a huge kitchen of course) and just be f r e e. Seriously, it’s going to happen. I know. Also, I want to go to the beach.

We’ve been married for over 4 years and 2 months. I still just have the best husband. He is so supportive of me and what I love and he works so hard. Also, he puts up with my moods, like when I go around throwing everything away and getting out the calculator thinking we can afford to go to the beach tomorrow.
I’ve been really sentimental about old photos lately and my new goal is to have photo books (I’ll have room for them because I’m throwing everything else away, ha!). So that is our new presents for each other, having more moments together, but also hopefully getting them into books to remember forever.
The last few nights we’ve been playing Skip Bo every night. I actually prefer it to Nertz, but I hate admitting that. I keep wondering when there will be a night where we just stop playing or we’re too tired, but I think we are addicted.
I miss a lot of people but I am so happy we have time to travel soon.

August is such a weird month when your husband is in school. I really want it to keep being summer (actually, I really want to re-do this summer. why does school make everything go so fast yet painfully slow?) but I also love flannel and the beginning of new seasons. Only about one more week until school starts. I think I could throw myself on the floor flailing and crying. I think most of the time I remember it worse than it actually is. This entire next year Andy learns Hebrew. I hope to learn the art of being happy, even with late nights and Hebrew learning.

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getting settled

We are beginning to feel settled in our new place, although there is still much to do. The move was bittersweet. I feel like Andy and I grew up in Fuller together. Maybe it is me because I never experienced a different city before, but I’m finding it changes you and makes you grow up. Fuller is where we learned to be married when everything was new, hard, and different.

It is nice, however, to feel like we have our own little place. We no longer feel like college dorm mates. Cooking is a million times easier. Doing laundry feels like I’m resting on a fluffy cloud eating chocolate to my heart’s content. Our water pressure would be Kramer-approved. We like it here. It feels like home.

Traditional sleeping on the floor the first night in our new place.

Fuller, I do not miss your kitchen. (Yes, this was our kitchen, with a tiny refrigerator to the right.)

This is how we clean: spotless.

This is how we look after moving and cleaning.

Our new home! Our first home without an apartment number in the address!

My favorite view on my walk home.

Our first game in our new place–the squirrel game!
Thank you to everyone who helped us move! You blessed us more than you will ever know!

looking back and looking forward

It is a new year here for us. We have been here for one year (actually 14 months!). It saddens me and excites me at the same time. I am sad to realize how quickly time does pass in seminary. I am excited that we are no longer new here. We know people. We know places. We are almost kind of settled. It’s a new school year and we kind of know what we are doing. It is still summer, so I am not done with my “summer to do list,” but looking at it, all I can do is laugh. We had someone else pick blueberries for us. (Does that count or just make us the saddest couple ever?) I went through one of those phases where I felt like I deserved a gold star just getting out of bed (anyone else have those or am I just crazy?) and on top of that I had an upper respitory infection for a month. Andy worked every Saturday so we didn’t do random fun things like go to the farmer’s market. We still are not moved. I don’t think we saved any money this summer (and we’re both pretty extreme savers). But we’ve had fun and went to Disney with Andy’s family (the happiest place on earth and I got to feel like a six year old for a week!) and enjoyed beautiful weather and ate some amazing food and found a lot of things we needed for free or pretty close to free. For this last part of summer I want to look forward and focus on big picture things. I want to:

1. be creative and complete this self-portrait challenge
2. read. we are here to learn and lately that is all I want to do. i have a growing spreadsheet of over 100 books I want to read. i think if I focused I could read 1 (or more if they’re small!) book a week.
3. be a friend

So, friends, happy new year! May the rest of your summer days be like a warm hug, as they have been to us.

lately {july} in words and pictures

petting caramel, curly-haired dogs
devouring good books
watching a beaver leisurely walk through a front yard in the middle of the city

cancelling Netflix and
listening to the Harry Potter series

savoring Coffee Crisps and maple cookies from Canada
playing the piano (after a fairly long break from the piano I can all of a sudden play and sing at the same time!)

walking slowly in the evening summer breezes
longing for more freshly ground wheat pancakes shared with friends

scoring amazing free finds
hooked for life on audio books

hearing Andy say “I’ve been reading fashion magazines…stop laughing…it’s for my job!”
enjoying life with my best friend

around here

I hate moving. I get really emotional about everything. I get restless and can’t think about anything but nesting. I worry we’ll have the worst neighbors and that we might have made a very bad decision. I freak out about how much stuff we have and want to throw everything away. I start to wonder if Andy would notice any missing books. I stop cleaning everything except the bathroom. I try to convince Andy we could afford a dog.

I’m not a pro-mover. This is my third move. I dream about settling down in a house with Andy for the next twenty years. I dream about actually picking out a place because we like it, not because we had to take the first thing available. But my perfect dream probably does not have as many memories and funny times as our life: cleaning every day to try to get rid of smoke smells, asking the 80-year old neighbor if he could turn down his hip hop music, waking Andy up in the middle of the night to kill bugs, having your apartment at eye level with all the students that walk by and just wanting some sort of privacy, walking out your door and getting nauseous from all the smells, spending three weeks trying to find the laundry room. Andy, it’s been a good three years and I promise I didn’t get rid of any books and I promise I will be okay just like the other times because I love you.

So far, this summer has not gone at all like I hoped. With trying to move, Andy ending up taking a summer class, being sick, volunteering for things I didn’t plan on, and Andy working more and during the times of summer things like berry picking and farmer’s marketing it really feels like “the summer we’re trying to survive.” But I’m learning that the Lord takes care of us, not me. I’m seeing the Lord provide for our unexpected moving costs. I’m seeing my prayer “help me to be a friend” answered in ways I didn’t expect. I’m learning to just enjoy life. I’m learning life kind of is having all your plans messed up and your house in chaos. I told Andy I realized that I let having a messy apartment dictate my mood and how I feel and think, when I should only find my peace in God, not in a clean apartment and organized life. (Although I do think there is something to say for having order, but I should not let that be my definition of peace and a good mood.) So, I’m learning to enjoy now and not be sad that we might only get four things checked off our summer fun list. I do hope next summer is slower. I do hope we do not move again next summer unless that’s a move with a house, dog, and baby, but I think that dream is still a little farther off than I hope.

summer (to do)

It’s summer. Really, it’s been summer for a month. Andy has been out of school. The weather has been pretty nice. Life is slowing down. Since we’ve been married summer has really started to become my favorite season. Long days. Leisurely walks. Everything relaxes. Last month I didn’t feel like we were able to enjoy the first glimpses of summer because we had several time-consuming surprises come up. Now we’re getting rid of the stress and embracing summer. Let the magic begin.

1. spend as many moments as possible with Andy
2. blueberry picking
3. trail running
4. park exploring
5. visit cave hill cemetery
6. plenty of farmer’s marketing
7. go to a waterfront concert
9. eat good food
10. make our new house a home
11. share it with others
12. long late night walks
13. visit a new city
14. read a book with Andy
15. quit sugar (except for dark chocolate)
16. dance under the stars
17. sit outside on a porch at night
18. write more
19. buy a bicycle
20. go on a million bike rides
21. really keep a dinner diary
22. finish watching Call the Midwife (current favorite show)
23. run 3 miles
24. grow a plant
25. find the perfect elephant for our new place
26. put money back in savings
27. wear my summer little black dress
28. go see a summer movie

i want to remember

I am so excited for fall and scarves and everything pumpkin and chills in the air and hot chocolate and mittens and more walks. It is the first day of Autumn, but Summer 2012 I so enjoyed and I don’t want to forget.

I want to remember what it felt like to put on shorts, a t-shirt, and water shoes and walk outside and feel the warm embrace of the sun.

 I want to remember all the goodbyes and hugs and tears.

I want to remember what it feels like to drive ten hours to your new home, everything crammed in your car.

I want to remember everything feeling new and fresh and light.

I want to remember what it feels like to move to a new city.

I want to remember making a pallet on the floor and falling asleep holding hands, talking about our new life.

I want to remember the amazing sunlight flooding through the windows every evening.

I want to remember barbequing with friends and grilling corn and watching the Olympics.

I want to remember all the rice and pb&j we ate.

I want to remember setting off the smoke alarm three times and the fireman coming.

I want to remember all the books I loved.

I want to remember eating lots of homemade popcorn.

I want to remember the crazy amount of time Andy and I got to spend together.

I want to remember Andy waking up and killing bugs.

I want to remember all the places we explored.

I want to remember our families coming and visiting.

I want to remember doing laundry together.

I want to remember meeting Mrs. Schreiner and feeling so welcomed and her saying she knew we would stay at Clifton.

I want to remember all the lazy, relaxing Sundays.

I want to remember the farmer’s market.

I want to remember all the tears.

I want to remember the picnic in the park with our little sandwiches and lots of love, talking about what we’ve been learning and what our life might look like in 5-10 years.

I want to remember all the great smoothies we drank.

I want to remember being squished on our little couch.

I want to remember watching Psych every night for dinner.

I want to remember all the deep, uncontrollable laughter.

I want to remember this summer as the summer I loved summer.

*This post was inspired by a great writing prompt from Ali Edwards.