brain dump

IMG_8775We’ve been going on summer night walks. Do you ever want to walk forever? Someday I hope Andy gets home before 7 pm, so dinner doesn’t go til 8, and if that ever happens, I know in the summer nights we will walk and run and bike, and I hope it’s for forever.

I always thought when I was like, 25, I would have life figured out. No more freaky decisions, sure of everything, no longer scared of people, easy peasy. Why did that not happen?

Andy took two summer classes this j-term. It’s been all summer, but for two weeks, man that was pure torture. I thought we were going to die. Why does everything bad happen on the already worst weeks and then no one has time to make dinner and I don’t even know the last time I cleaned and I want to get rid of a million things.

Speaking of, do you ever just want to throw everything away? Lately all I want to do is get rid of everything. I want to downsize (even more) (except have a huge kitchen of course) and just be f r e e. Seriously, it’s going to happen. I know. Also, I want to go to the beach.

We’ve been married for over 4 years and 2 months. I still just have the best husband. He is so supportive of me and what I love and he works so hard. Also, he puts up with my moods, like when I go around throwing everything away and getting out the calculator thinking we can afford to go to the beach tomorrow.
I’ve been really sentimental about old photos lately and my new goal is to have photo books (I’ll have room for them because I’m throwing everything else away, ha!). So that is our new presents for each other, having more moments together, but also hopefully getting them into books to remember forever.
The last few nights we’ve been playing Skip Bo every night. I actually prefer it to Nertz, but I hate admitting that. I keep wondering when there will be a night where we just stop playing or we’re too tired, but I think we are addicted.
I miss a lot of people but I am so happy we have time to travel soon.

August is such a weird month when your husband is in school. I really want it to keep being summer (actually, I really want to re-do this summer. why does school make everything go so fast yet painfully slow?) but I also love flannel and the beginning of new seasons. Only about one more week until school starts. I think I could throw myself on the floor flailing and crying. I think most of the time I remember it worse than it actually is. This entire next year Andy learns Hebrew. I hope to learn the art of being happy, even with late nights and Hebrew learning.

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summer

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And so with the sunshine and the great bursts of leaves growing on the trees, just as things grow in fast movies, I had that familiar conviction that life was beginning over again with the summer. {F. Scott Fitzgerald, The Great Gatsby}

greatness

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We had such a wonderful time that we couldn’t bear to go back to our regular lives, and so we decided we just wouldn’t. And then all the greatness began. {Unknown}

weekending

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I want to bottle up this weekend so I can remember it and smell it and hold it close for the rest of my life. I feel so free, so alive, so carefree after a day with Andy, after a bike ride, after a long day in the sun. These photos are filled with my favorites. My favorite street, music, Andy, sunshine. Sometimes you need your favorite bourbon mint ice cream and friendly faces and putting off a paper to bike for three hours and just l i v e. I would rather spend a million days home with you exploring and running and singing and laughing than seeing a grand exotic location. You are my adventure. You are my love. xo, h

life and april goals

Has my last post really only been about our last meal plan?! Last month I took an added seminar and have been focusing all writing on my homework for that. It isn’t hard, but I have a one track mind about that kind of stuff and focused on it whenever I felt the urge to write. I’m thinking about posting my papers about the seminar and my book review. Would that be boring? I just hate when writing becomes forgotten in an online folder, you know? I really am planning to stay more in touch and have some writing and surprises lined up.

Andy has been working over time the past week or so and man, that. sucks. That is starting to wind down so hopefully life will settle down into a nice routine, especially post semester. Other than that we are chugging along and dreaming of summer.

April goals:

*Offline after 6 p.m. unless I’m writing or learning.

*Get back on a structured schedule, create routines. (Anyone have some fun routines you add in to your week or month you’d like to share?)

*Buckle down and finish some projects.

I think this weekend holds some bike rides and long walks. I hope to post the last meal plan soon and get back to more writing and pictures. Have a good one! xo

 

a little bit of life {an update}

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“March came in that winter like the meekest and mildest of lambs, bringing days that were crisp and golden and tingling, each followed by a frosty pink twilight which gradually lost itself in an elfland of moonshine.”
L.M. Montgomery

March.  I am so happy for a new month.  I can feel the hope of more bike rides and quiet walks. I have not meant to leave writing and be more quiet lately. Life has been good, but a little overwhelming. I am easily overwhelmed and this semester has felt especially hard. I probably get like this every semester during the last half, but being in seminary this semester has been tough for all sorts of the same reasons it is hard on everyone else. All my dreams seem to be in the future and the present problems seem like a mire that I will never be able to escape. Most days I just feel like I’m living life to get through the now. Being in seminary creates an environment where I am constantly trying to remind myself that our life is not “on hold.” Life is going on right now. We are living right now. We are not waiting for the real world to begin. We are creating memories right now. We are a family right now. I am called to live in the right now. As I look at the calendar and realize how this season is fleeting, I want to enjoy it. Some days it is so easy. Some days it feels unbearably hard. I want to remember why I am here. I want to look back upon this time with fondness.

A little late, but a few March goals:

*spend 15 minutes a day enjoying something {a book, sunshine, knitting}

*serve Andy by doing more chores

That is it. Some of my goals last month were a little too unrealistic, although they pushed me to get more done than I probably would have. I want to take this month slow though, and have time to ponder and enjoy. I do hope to get a meal plan post up soon. We had some good food in February! xo

going to the beach

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Recently, when the sun is actually shining on an afternoon where I don’t have anything going on right after work, I’ve found myself sitting in my reading corner (properly placed couch and foot rest and side table right next to a window) and actually reading, sometimes knitting. I can feel my spirits rising like a solar-powered battery. It’s become such a tiny luxury that I am constantly checking the weather forecast for sunshine and pushing all other activities aside for 30 minutes (maybe longer if it’s been a bad few days). It does me absolute wonders. One day, I noticed that the sun was shining more on the floor (rather than my reading nook) and created a pallet in the floor. It was a weekend and I promptly ran to get Andy and told him “We’re going to the beach!” And there, on our pallet in the sunshine, we silently fell asleep pretending we were at the beach. It was the most relaxing experience I think I’ve ever had. Probably more relaxing than driving in the car for twelve hours, plopping down on the beach followed by sand getting all over you and loud people ruining your nap (at least, for those like me that would rather stay home than travel anywhere and would do anything to avoid a crowd of people, you know, all those fun-suckers in your life). So now, our favorite form of having a date (because we’re fun-suckers with no money, you know) is saying, “Hey, do you want to go to the beach this Friday? Hey, do you want to lay at the beach this weekend?” And there, we will read or sleep or talk and it really is perfect. I can’t wait until we have kids to enjoy this with, too if we ever live somewhere with unbearable winters with them. (Is that a dream? Like, do people have kids that are quiet and weird and like to lay in the sun imagining things with their parents or is it just a weird mid-twenties thing?) Does anyone else do something similar or have ideas for free fun during winter? xo

There is a privacy about it which no other season gives you…. In spring, summer and fall people sort of have an open season on each other; only in the winter, in the country, can you have longer, quiet stretches when you can savor belonging to yourself.
~Ruth Stout