Mourning with those who mourn taught by Heath Lambert encouraged and ministered to my heart. Right away he opened my mind by saying that we need mourners. We need people mourning in our life to obey the command, “Rejoice with those who rejoice and mourn with those who mourn.” I often think they need me to comfort them or listen to them. But it was such a wonderful truth hearing we need each other in grief. Something that I think will greatly benefit me in future ministry, when I will probably go through mourning with a lot of people, is “people who are going through grief are not interruptions. This is a kindness of the Lord to help you be obedient.”
Something else that was a strange comfort to my heart, was Dr. Lambert telling a story of being at a funeral where a husband had lost his wife. The husband was wailing and screaming over the casket out of grief at the funeral and a man came up and rebuked the husband. Dr. Lambert said he was shocked that the man was rebuking the husband for mourning. Dr. Lambert said he personally he thought the husband had it together pretty well considering what happened but also that mourning is good and that is what he (Dr. Lambert) would be doing or worse if he lost his wife. I often have fears of something happening to my husband and to hear a seminary professor say he couldn’t imagine the grief or how he would ever be able to handle losing his wife, helped me as I often wonder the same thing.
Another particularly helpful thing in going through grief with someone is to know mourning requires commitment. Something I want to become better at is committing to a long term process of mourning with those who mourn. To remind myself to visit them, call them, send them a note.
Lastly and most importantly, Dr. Lambert shared that mourning requires Jesus. The main comfort we have in grief is that one day all mourning will end. We were promised sufferings in this life and when we go through mourning with others we must experience it as our own loss, to be a comfort and to prepare for our own suffering someday. We also must repent when we are tempted to not care, when it is easier to feel distant. Jesus is our comfort and he will give us the grace to mourn.